Agony of Agonies
Scared and inadequate, I am broken and in despair. Have you heard my prayers lately, I sob in my spirit and cry with my soul. I want to make you sad with this poem, so get a tissue and cry with me, maybe you are where I am. My legs are numb from standing in worship and my hands are tired from being raised up. My inadequacy has married my fears and I have a child called sorrow. I have believed the father of lies, now I’m reaping discord in every relationship, following after me, tragedy. How dare you say, I am not a human being, can’t you see I am wallowing in self-pity, leave me be. I hated hate, but my will wasn’t strong enough and neither did I look at the cross for help, so rebellion has also come home to roost and now I’m a witch doctor. Absurd notion of pessimism in the air, drastic measures of self-control lacking. My dreams have no aspiration and everything I wanted to be has been washed down the river of life. I doubt him now more than ever before, and sinful unbelief has m